California (version1)

i don't know how 2 tell u i was weak,
i don't know how 2 justfiy these tear stains on my cheek,
i don't have it in me 2 look u in the eyes,
and tell u why i've done what i'm gonna do here 2night,

and for sure i cannot tell the kids their daddy's gone,
cannot express in a note just what the hell's gone wrong,
so the last favor i can ask u if i can ask u anything at all,
is don't tell em how hard was their daddy's fall,

just tell em i went out to california,
with plans 2 be a movie star some day,
tell em i will call, when i get there,
and when the phone doesn't ring,
just make up.. anything,

i don't know how i let things get this far,
i don't know why i keep breaking what's left of my heart,
and i don't know why i can't just get 1 single thing right,
and why loving me ain't easy, it always has 2 be a fight,

don't show em this letter that i've written,
don't let em know what really happened here,
don't bring em to whatever services there are,
just tell em that their daddy 1 day will be a star,
and then that won't be quite a lie,
and they can see me every night,
when they pray.. when they pray,

tell em that i went to california,
tell em that i had plans 2 be the biggest star they've ever seen,
and when i can't call can u come up with something to stall,
buy them a little time until i can get my wings,
cuz when they find out i didn't go to california,
and that their daddy was the biggest failure this world has ever seen,
i don't want them 2 be sad, i don't want them 2 be mad,
of what really happened here 2day..

so just tell em that i went to california