December Abortion

many many times i contemplated suicide as a child to escape the abuse that was happening on a daily basis.  many times i would try and fail.  nightmares and memories have persisted to attack over the years and in 2006 they almost got the better of me...  shortly after, this piece came to me..

December Abortion

December came with snow and rain,
The cold brought with it a brutal pain,
A reminder of a birth, and a death,
An Abortion 10 years 2 late,
A loss of everything,
4 years with fate,
A time of Jesus,
Time spent in hell,
A Timmy without a Lassie,
Stuck all alone in a well,
A Time of Christmas celebration,
The first time i knew RAPE,
A time when u Love,
A time when i Hate,
A time of presents,
Puts that past in the present,
While visions of sugar-plumbs dance in your head,
Visions of Pastor climbing into bed,
Visions of Pat and Johnny attacking Chris,
Chris praying..What kind of life is this?
A time of scarves, coats and sweaters,
Somebody help me,
Somebody better,
Merry Christmas to all and to all a good night,
While i prayed,
Please Jesus,
Take My Life...